Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Without Hope or Agenda

The day before Christmas Eve, a vase full of beautiful red roses was delivered to my office. For a brief moment, I entertained the fantasy that they were for me (because I’m a girl and couldn’t help it). Sadly, the envelope was addressed to one of our residents. I dutifully notified her via phone and e-mail of her special delivery. We would be closing early on Christmas Eve, so I wanted to make sure that she received them before the holiday.


These particular roses cost $115. What a waste.
A very beautiful, heart-rending waste.


But the resident never came. The flowers were still sitting on the table when I returned from my mini-vacation four days later. By then they were all wilted and sad looking. I’ve always thought that in theory, flowers are a terrible gift. They inevitably die (plus they’re way overpriced and I don’t believe in wasting money). I still love getting them, though! It’s the thought that counts more than anything, right?


Sad!


When the roses died for real, the office housekeeper threw them away and washed out the vase. She put the card on my desk to give to the resident if she ever came to pick it up. It turns out that the resident had called to see who they were from. She authorized my co-worker to open the card and read it over the phone.


This is what it said:


“_____ Just wanted to say, without hope or agenda, just because it’s Christmas (and at Christmas you tell the truth), to me, you are perfect. Thinking of you and wishing you a Merry Christmas : ) _____”


My cold, crusty heart just melted at that! And if you are a complete loon and didn’t recognize the reference, this guy was quoting a famously heartbreaking scene from the greatest Christmas movie/romantic comedy/anytime movie ever, Love, Actually. I was shocked, SHOCKED I TELL YOU, that none of my co-workers were familiar with it. Once I explained the significance (it basically means that this poor sod is in love with a girl he knows he can never have, but still feels compelled to spill his ever-loving guts out to in one of the sweetest ways possible), they nearly died from estrogen-overload as well! The girl's response to this note was, and I quote, "Oh." Could she be less enthused?



The notoriously frustrating yet sweet scene in question.




The fact that this biznatch must have totally shot him down got me all up in arms. I mean, I don't know this girl or her situation. Maybe she's also married to the guy's best friend like in Love, Actually. Maybe she's a lesbian. Or perhaps she really just doesn't have those feelings for him no matter how much she wishes she did. I also don't particularly care if the guy is a screamingly hideous, soul-sucking bastard (though I highly doubt it if he's willing to quote an uber-chick flick and send roses). All I know is, if I had received those flowers, I would have bolted past airport security with sweeping, epic string music in the background and a crowd of Portuguese townsfolk following me, only to bang on the window of the gate where the guy (who inevitably looks like Sexy Jesus) is getting on the last plane out to America, and start belting, "All I want for Christmas is you!"


Unintentionally stole this from my friend Jess.
The other most frustrating scene in Love, Actually.


Who knows if the resident will ever stop by to claim her empty vase and love note. On second thought, she better not. Otherwise she'll get a punch on the nose from me, having imagined this grand and tragic love story that never was.

6 comments:

  1. Awwwwwww

    My guess is that when you read her the card, her significant other was standing next to her, so she wasn't allowed to say any more. Chances are that he was also off work for the holidays, so she couldn't very well come home with a bouquet of flowers from some other dude, could she? Even if he wasn't off for the holidays, he would have seen them and asked questions. Her admirer may be very romantic, but he's not thinking very practically! The reason the dude in the movie proclaimed his love in that way was so that Kiera Knightly's husband couldn't see or hear it. That was smart...flowers, not so much (but very sweet).

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  2. I love that movie :) That "caroling" scene makes me melt! So sweet.
    I would've at least saved the note, even if I couldn't have taken the flowers.

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  3. Meep. Had a cry. Damn I want me some flowers.

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  4. Surprise surprise, she never came in to pick up the card or the vase. It's still sitting on my desk, wedged somewhere underneath my computer. I can't bear to throw that card away! It would just kill my soul too much...

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