Saturday, October 2, 2010


It is my friend's birthday today and he just invited me to come hang out with his friends at the Edison Lounge downtown tonight. My first instinct was panic. The following are my reasons:

1. The Edison sounds swanky. Which means I will feel like a homely midwestern cousin (who's actually from Northern California) that they take pity on in my $20, three year old dress from Target that is a smidgen too small. If they let me in at all.
2. Though I just got paid, I'm still recovering from my recent bout of unemployment. And awkward social occasions require at least one glass of overpriced wine for me to loosen up and be my sparkling self.
3. Downtown parking, if you can find it, is a pain in the butt. One of my charming idiosyncrasies is that I tend to avoid situations in which parking is difficult. It stresses me out way more than it would the average non-neurotic person. Plus I always get hit on by black homeless guys named Tiny who play the jazz trumpet, while walking to/from my car.
4. I don't know very many people here even after over a year, and I should use this opportunity to expand my social network. (Brief shout-out to the random yet brilliant team of David Fincher and Aaron Sorkin). The problem here is that I don't really like meeting new people, being a stodgy misanthrope.
5. Sad as it is, I really just want to do nothing today. My big plans were to watch old episodes of Two Guys, a Girl and a Pizza Place (I'm on a Ryan Reynolds kick right now). I should be writing my Great American Novel, but I'll probably end up spending the weekend with a slightly obscure late 90s sitcom.

But I would like to see my friend again, and it has been too long since I interacted with normal people (outside my office, that is). So I may force myself to shower, straighten my mutinous hair with the savage yet effective In-Styler, and drive all the way (10 minutes) downtown to celebrate the birth of my former writing partner and UC Irvine cohort with a delicious yet bank-breaking glass of merlot.

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